Wednesday, January 31, 2007

THE LIFE OF A VAGABOND

Thats the life I have been living since last Thursday.
Glad to say, I no longer reside with my father.
Glad to say, I don't have to deal with an emotional alcoholic who justifies all of his actions into being "RIGHT".
Sad to say, Kaeven, did not need to see us arguing and fighting.
Sad to say, I wasn't prepared for this aburpt change in livelihood.
I mean, the reason I moved to Dallas with my father was for support, right?
WRONG!
So once again, as always in my life, I am all alone to fend for myself.
Sad to say, I am not alone, I have a child.
Glad to say, he is my motivation, cause if I didn't have him, I can be a vagabond all by myself and not have to worry about shit, but when will the LORD TAKE MY LIFE.....
Not to sound suicidal, but you feel me?
At least I can say this....
I have my mental sanity, which means more to me, than having a father figure for my son(but what kind of figure can you be when you can't control your liquor), having support with bills and saving money.
You can't put a price on being free from mental anguish and abuse.
I'm saying, if one person can drive you to the brink of wanting to end your own beautiful life, that is really a lot to say about someone.
In short, one must distant themselves from that.
Although I am not financially stable at the present, I have my mental stability.
Although, I am not positioned and planted, I have my son and I have a bit of privacy.


Things aren't as bad as they seem.
I've been down too long, so the only way to go is up.
So with that said, I probably won't be seeing or reading on you guys, until I am settled in my humble abode, with internet access.

I LOVE YALL,
Yall the only family, that has never faultered, and I don't even know yall...

LUV!!!

14 comments:

Hassan said...

Got your message. Get at me with that number. Hung out here all day for your ass to return that email

Paula D. said...

Good luck to you!

Thoughts of a Southern gal said...

Keep your head up. It can only good better!

Rashan Jamal said...

I feel you, but just remember, it has to get better. It sucks that you can't depend on other people, but it'll only make you stronger. Stay strong, Nika!

Drama Kween said...

HEY GIRL!!!!

NegroPino™ said...

*sniff* Im mad i m just now seeing this...I wish there was something i can do..but remember this too shall pass...I wish u the best and good luck..u have my email..so hit me

TrinaBeingTrina said...

I'm sorry to hear about your troubles especially since this is the first time I have stopped by in a while. I sure wasn't expecting to hear bad news. But like negropino said..this too shall pass.

Good luck babygirl.

911 said...

Damn I wish I could do more than give words of advice and what not stay up ma.....I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing. 1

YAZMAR said...

GIRL you know all you gotta do is holla, just say the word and Yaz is here!!! Better days are ahead for real....

You gotta distance yourself from all the negative shit in ya life....a lot of people do it all the time like MJB for instance...You stronger than that!!!

JoJo D. said...

Girl, it's gone be alright. Sounds like you need some "popcorn"... email me and I'll see about making a special delivery...

MsPerdie said...

Hey, long time no speak. i'm sorry you're going through hard times right now, but just know that you ahve friends, people you can call on when in need. Hope you're not mad at me anymore :( Good luck hon, and call if you need me.

Honey-Libra said...

Haven't been by in a MINUTE!! Figured I'd stop through to catch up and you're right you can't put a price on piece of mind especially when it comes to you and the well being of you child..take it easy :)

TTD said...

(((HUGS)))

hope things get better for u really soon... take care & keep ur head up...

Newy said...

I hope you are doing alright...I miss reading you . (((hugs)))